Apologetics: Flippin Fatwa Friday – Muhammad was the Gayest Guy in Arabia – Part 3: Miscellaneous Creepy Accounts.

From the last two posts on this, we know that Muhammad had a very strange relationship with the angel Gabriel – who just happened – to look like a dude Muhammad knew who was known for his beauty; and that Muhammad had a midnight rendezvous with not one, not two, but thirty men in the desert. This should be enough evidence that Muhammad was bi, but those weren’t the only accounts that point to him having strange homosexual tendencies. There are loads of accounts of him being creepy towards men and boys scattered throughout numerous authentic hadiths.

#1: Muhammad’s Questionable Stains

It is hard to deny that Muhammad was a nasty person. From telling his followers to drink camel urine to having other people lick his hands clean, he was gross. However, one of the most well-attested reports in the hadith is the report that Aisha – Muhammad’s child bride – had the disgusting job of washing semen off his clothes.

This report appears in numerous hadiths, most notably Sahih Bukhari and Sahih Muslim, where several of the accounts are from Aisha herself. She even went in-depth on how she would get it off, saying that if it was still wet, she would wash it off with water, but if it was dry, she would rub, scratch, or pick it off the fabric.

Muslims claim that this hadith is educational, recording what to do if your clothes get stained with any sexual fluid, but the question has to be asked: Where was all this stuff coming from? To answer this, Muslim teachers say that it came from Muhammad sleeping with his wives or other normal causes. However, while this seems like a reasonable explanation at first glance, it doesn’t totally explain how much semen was on his clothes, since Aisha reported that even after washing his clothes, there was still stuff on it.

Though this isn’t totally damning evidence that Muhammad was gay, it does raise a lot of questions that point in that direction.

#2: Sucking on Boy’s Tongues

If you Google this, the main thing that will come up is a hadith about Muhammad allowing his grandkids to suck on his tongue because they were extremely thirsty and there was no water anywhere. Due to this, one would think that, while a strange way of dealing with things, it was at least somewhat justifiable. However, what calls even this into question is the fact that that’s not the only hadith about Muhammad sucking on boy’s tongues. In Mu’awiya Ibn Abu Sufyan 16245 it says:

I saw the prophet – pbuh – sucking on the tongue or the lips of Al-Hassan son of Ali, may the
prayers of Allah be upon him. For no tongue or lips that the prophet sucked on will be tormented (by hell fire).

Al-Hassan was Muhammad’s grandson. This isn’t just gay and pedophilic, it’s insanely creepy on the level of the Dali Lama telling a kid to suck his tongue a few years ago. And for the hadith to go on to say that anyone who sucked on his lips or tongue will be saved from Hell…it sounds like the type of thing someone would say to get some action in the name of salvation, like these creepy cult leaders who demand the women sleep with them to be saved.

That also not mentioning the hadith in which Muhammad puts his tongue in al-Hassan’s mouth for no reason, or the Syrian biography written by Al-Amin Al-Ma’moun that mentions that Muhammad had allowed a kid named Ali to suck on his tongue.

#3: Muhammad Allowed a Guy to Kiss His Chest

In Sunan Abi Dawud 5224, we get a very strange narration in which this happens:

AbdurRahman ibn AbuLayla, quoting Usayd ibn Hudayr, a man of the Ansar, said that while he was given to jesting and was talking to the people and making them laugh, the Prophet (ﷺ) poked him under the ribs with a stick. He said: Let me take retaliation. He said: Take retaliation. He said: You are wearing a shirt but I am not. The Prophet (ﷺ) then raised his shirt and the man embraced him and began to kiss his side. Then he said: This is what I wanted, Messenger of Allah!

I don’t think this is something any straight dude would ever allow.

#4: Muhammad Going to the Bathroom

According to Sahih Al-Bukhari, Volume 1, Book 4, Number 152, whenever Muhammad went to the bathroom, he would bring some young boys with him to carry the tumblers of water needed to wash himself. Why would he need to do this? Why did he need the boys to come with him when he could have done it himself? It’s all extremely creepy.

#5: Muhammad and Zahir

In Al Seera Al Halabya by Al Halabya, we read that Muhammad hugged a slave boy from behind:

One day, Muhammad went to the market, there he found Zahir, whom he liked, so he hugged him from behind. Zahir said: let go of me, who are you? Muhammad told him: I’m the slave trader (literally, I’m the one who buys the slaves), and refused to let go of him so when Zahir knew it was Muhammad, he drew (stuck) his back closer to Muhammad’s chest.

Muslims argue that this was all an innocent prank being played by Muhammad, but this seems like a weird thing for a guy to do. To the dudes reading, is this something that straight guys do to prank each other or to express affection? From my knowledge, this is the type of thing that no truly straight guy would ever do.

#6: Muhammad and Young Boys

According to Majma al-Zawa’id, Ali ibn Abu Bakr al-Haythami, 299/9, Muhammad kissed the genitals of a kid named Husein. Need I say more.

#7: The Boys of Paradise

There are numerous verses and passages in the Quran that speak of the various pleasures to be had in Paradise. Several of them pay special attention to the young boys that will work as servers in Paradise. Surahs 52:24, 56:17-18, and 76:19 describe them as “scattered” or “hidden” pearls that will never alter in age. Already, this description is odd, since why would the servers be little boys when they could be anything else entirely, but it gets worse. New York Times columnist Judith Miller writes:

About two weeks before his murder, he mocked what passed for intellectual discourse among Islamists by citing a recent sermon by Egypt’s most popular preacher, Abdel Hamid Kishk, a blind sheikh who constantly attacked both the government and its official religious establishment. Kishk had been telling his audience that Muslims who entered paradise would enjoy ETERNAL ERECTIONS and the company of young boys draped in earrings and necklaces. Some of the ulema, the religious scholars at al-Azhar, the government’s seat of Islamic learning had disagreed. Yes, they said, men in paradise would have erections, BUT MERELY PROTRACTED, NOT PERPETUAL. Other experts disputed the possibility of pederasty in paradise.

That also doesn’t mention Islam’s long history of raping little boys, as well as women and girls that continues to this day in various forms.

It is clear from all of this that Muhammad had homosexual tendencies and even made it something to long for in eternity. Such sexual immorality should make one wonder if Allah truly is God, or if he’s the devil in disguise.

Until next time,

M.J.